Exactly As He Is
by highwayPULSE
Summary: Harry Potter feels torn. He can't help but feel responsible for the deaths in the Battle of Hogwarts. Still, Voldemort is gone and Ginny is his once more. This story takes place where Deathly Hallows left off and continues to fill in the 19 year gap to
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

**Coming to Terms **

_What had happened the night before? I think I remember, but is this real?_ Seventeen year old Harry Potter couldn't help but wonder. Absentmindedly, he traced the thin lighting scar on his forehead, hoping to find evidence that Lord Voldemort's soul had indeed been removed from his body. Harry was staring up at the canopy of his four-poster bed, the curtains surrounding him, snug inside the covers. He knew Ron occupied the bed next to him, he could hear Ron's muffled sobs_. Fred. Why Fred? Hadn't the weasleys sacrificed enough? If they hadn't of known me…_

Hours later, or so it seemed, Harry drifted into an uneasy sleep. The repulsive image if Voldemort haunted his dream, even in death. He woke several times that early morning panting, eventually giving up sleep. The deaths still hadn't fully hit Harry, except the loss of his friend and marauder, Remus Lupin. _Remus, you needn't have died! You silly man! You had a son! _It was too much, even for Harry Potter, The Savior of the Wizarding World.

"Can't you sleep? Harry, you look Bloody awful." said Ginny, noticing Harry walking aimlessly around the halls about an hour after he'd given up the hope of rest. Ginny was sitting on the stairs, her eyes heavy and her makeup running. He hated seeing her like this.

"Not if I can avoid it. I'm sick of seeing Voldemort die. Once was enough." said Harry, purposely avoiding Ginny's dark brown eyes. He didn't bother to ask her why she was still awake, he had his answer; Ginny was too stricken with grief and it showed in her face. Grief for Fred, for Collin, for Remus and Tonks, but for Harry, also.

"You're older now. I can see it in your eyes. Oh, Harry, how can something so wonderful make me feel so sad." Ginny said, rising from her place on the staircase, sounding defeated.

"I know how you feel. We've all suffered enough. When will the goddamn pain end?" spat Harry, hastily. And with this, he turned to leave. Seeing Ginny so broken down only confirmed his fear. He, Harry James Potter, had brought pain upon the people he loved. _If only Dumbledore had killed me as an infant…._

"HARRY POTTER, DON'T YOU LEAVE ME AGAIN! DON'T YOU TURN AWAY FROM ME AGAIN! I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN AND WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING TURNING YOUR BACK ON ME NOW !I WILL NEVER LET YOU LEAVE ME AGAIN!" screeched Ginny, and within seconds, she began to sob inconsolably into Harry's chest. After she had found her calm, she gave Harry the same hard blazing look she had given Harry from their first kiss and when he left her at Dumbledore's funeral. "You have always been my beacon of hope, and I can't bear to see you like this, so stop it! You're scaring me! I won't lose you. I'd kill myself…" said she. Harry didn't know what to do. He had never seen her in such a mood. He allowed his body to work at its will. After a few minuets, he found himself wrapped around Ginny, kissing her deeply. When they broke apart, she whispered,

"They'd want us to be together, to be happy."

"You think?" asked Harry, kissing her neck.

"I think. But you must promise me something."

"Anything."

"I want you kiss my forehead every night before bed, and I want you to hold me like holding me is going to keep you alive, and Harry?"

"yes?"

"I want you to love me." she whispered directly into his ear. This sent chills down his spine, and he took the opportunity to kiss her deeply once more. This time, however, his hands seemed to be listening to a master of their own…

"Will you do that?" said Ginny, half moaning with pleasure as Harry kissed her neck.

"For the rest of my life."

Harry and Ginny could have ended up doing many things that night, but Harry, being a perfect gentleman, kissed her forehead as promised, and bade her goodnight. All was _getting_ well…

As the afternoon approached, reporters and photographers were lined up outside the Hogwarts front doors, all dying to get the story of the death of the Dark Lord and the man who vindicated. Professor McGonagall would have none of it. There were enough people _inside _the castle hounding Harry. There needn't be anymore. He deserved his peace. The _Dailey Prophet _had been the first to report Voldemort's death. The bloody paper even confirmed that Rita Skeeter would be wring a book on Harry entitled _Harry Potter- Heroic or Harmful_? It was all happening so quickly! Suddenly, something that was not welcomed happened to Harry. Professor McGonagall invited him to her office claiming to have import matters concerning him awaiting in the dramatic head's office. There, Harry saw the very souls who had been responsibly for nine years of misery, his only living relatives, the Dursleys.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Vernon Dudley, Again **

"Boy." Uncle Vernon grunted, tipping his head to a slight nod. Harry couldn't believe his eyes. Quickly, he pinched the flesh on his arm to make sure he was not dreaming. Before him stood Dudley, Harry's large muscled cousin. Dudley glanced at Harry, extended his hand, and gave Harry a rather stupid look that implied he had lost his train of thought. Harry, unwilling, shook the beefy pink hand, casting a furtive look at Professor McGonagall. Harry closed his eyes, straining to remember what value he placed Dursleys before.

_Er- no, actually, they don't. _said Harry_. They think I'm a waste of space, actually, but I'm used to - "_

"_I don't think you're a waste of space.… You saved my life." _

"_Not really, _said Harry_. "It was your soul the dementors would have taken…" _

Harry blinked, coming back to realization. He then felt a hand on his shoulder, turning to see Hermione. She had a tear in her eye when she spoke.

"Its going to be okay now. Its over. I asked your family to come and -" Harry had cut her off mid sentence.

Rounding on Hermione he chocked, "You did WHAT!"

"Oh, Harry, I - I thought, you, that you would, want them to be here." Hermione said, timid and scared.

"Well, you thought wrong!" he said, his blood boiling. _How could she think such a thing!_

"Harry, you're being an idiot! The circumstances have changed! Voldemort's dead, Harry, so we should be embracing one another instead of pushing our families away!" Hermione said sternly. Harry gave another disapproving to the Dursleys.

"Yeah? Well, lets lock them in a broom cupboard!"

"Oh, Harry, you're delusional!"

"NO! Lets lock them in there! I think the one by the dungeons is spider infested enough, don't you?" He said, beginning shake with rage. _This is my world and they are not a part of it, of me…_

"I don't understand," began Professor McGonagall.

"WHAT EXACTLY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND! I think it's time they been forced to taste their own medicine! For nine years I lived in the cupboard under the stairs! For nine years I was treated like dirt! Now its their turn!" Harry said, trying to stay as calm as possible. Aunt Petunia burst into tears, evidently frightened. Harry ignored this.

" WHAT exactly makes you think you have any right to interfere in my life, Hermione! You always have to be right, don't you! You always have to come up with a logical solution for everything!" Harry said, struggling with every word.

Dudley, finally, lowered his hand, still raised from it's shake with Harry's, and went to comfort his mother. Hermione wore a look of utter bewilderment. Her eyes were moist and her expression was solemn. Harry stuck his hand into his back pocket, and found the Elder Wand. He slowly removed his hands from his pocket, feeling sickened from just laying a hand on the powerful device. Hermione drew a breath.

"Why didn't you tell me and Ron or Ginny? Harry, I swear I never knew you were abused as a child. I just always assumed that you argued with your Uncle and Aunt a lot."

" I wasn't abused,"

"Maybe not physically, but surely, mentally… Why didn't you tell us?" said Hermione. Harry looked into her face, seeing the familiar features of pure regret.

"Would you have told anyone? All of these people were talking about me and giving me credit for something I didn't even remember…I just felt like I could start over, I guess." Harry said, appreciating Hermione's sincere concern. At his words, uncle Vernon spoke.

"Now wait just a ruddy minuet! How dare you suggest I mistreat _anyone,_"Vernon said, refusing to mention Harry's name at all,"Do I look abusive!"

"You also look like a coward! Now, sir, madam, I ask you to take your son and leave! It was a mistake inviting you here! Good day to you." Professor McGonagall said coldly. Dudley waved a hand in farewell and hurried after his parents, who had scurried like rats after McGonagall had finished speaking. Harry had never felt so embarrassed and ashamed of who he was. Not only was he Harry Potter, the Boy who lived, but he was now Harry Potter, defenseless child. He had been through so much devastation within the last forty-eight hours. _When will it end for me? Maybe I should just stop trying…_

Hermione left Harry with Professor McGonagall to make herself useful. The bodies of the dead had been moved to chambers and now the task of repairing the broken historical school had begun. Harry had purposely removed himself from everyone else. He had hurt them all. Sure he had ended it, but if he had just moved a little faster…It felt even worse that people were praising him and thanking as if he was a hero. He certainly didn't feel like a hero. He hurt inside. He close his eyes and remembered the words of Albus Dumbledore.

_Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love._

But had that been real? It was all so unclear. Harry thought and knew that, maybe someday, everything would be okay. Yes, many had died, but Voldemort would not bring upon any more death. Exhausted and slightly nauseous, Harry smiled, sadly. It felt odd to do so, as it had been so long since he smiled at all . He had done it. He brought upon the death of Tom Riddle. It would take many more months before Harry would feel whole again, but, as I've mentioned before, All was _getting_ well.

Harry Potter sat on the grass with his arms around Ginny Weasley. Ginny was being particularly secretive today and he knew she was up to something. But she wasn't the only one being surreptitious; the rest of Dumbledore's Army refused to answer any of his questions about anything other than "What time is it." To Harry's dismay, the reporters had gotten their story on Harry. Aunt Petunia had shouted the entire events of what had happened in McGonagall's office to every reporter in the Wizarding World. Their stories ranged, however, from stories of neglect and disregard, to stories of Harry terrorizing the Dursley family. Harry wouldn't be surprised if the media came back, but he would not let this bother him. At that particular moment, he wanted nothing more than to snog Ginny Weasley, his reason for happiness…


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **I promise that the next chapter will be a lot cheerier than this one is. Keep with me, Loves! Also, due to numerous requests, I have made this chapter much longer than my usual chapters! Reviews much appreciated. These are all Jo's characters, not mine, but I thank her for letting me play with them! )

**Chapter Three**

**Homage to Dumbledore's Army. **

On the Friday following the Battle Of Hogwarts, The families of those who had sacrificed themselves began to arrive. The majority of Dumbledore's Army sat in the room of requirement finalizing their plan.

"I was thinking, we lost a lot of fantastic souls in the battle, so I thought we could pay our respects by making their families honorary members of Dumbledore's Army. They should know that their children and friends are heroes to us and that we'll always be in debt to their sacrifice. They should know that we really care and the loss is killing each and every one of us too." Ginny said, mopping her eyes with the sleeve of her cloak.

"Well said, Ginny." Harry said. He knew exactly whom he wanted to name as an honorary member… Everyone else present muttered an agreement. It was settled. At dinner that night, they would pay homage to the worthiest, the true Dumbledore's Army.

About halfway through desert, the mini army left their seats to the staff table.

"If I could have everyone's attention for just a few moments," Neville said. "Dumbledore's Army would like to take this opportunity to name honorary members. These brave souls risked everything for the well being of the Wizarding World, just to help us leave this world a better place. We are indebt to their sacrifices. They were so willing to help, so determined to succeed, that they gave their own lives. These people are the bravest people to ever walk these halls and, to us, they are heroes. Would Mr. and Mrs. Creevy please stand." The tiny muggle couple stood, looking close to the verge of tears. Neville could no longer speak, so Luna took over for him.

"To Mr. and Mrs. Creevy. Your son was so amazing. Let us hope that he is now happy and safe, away from the evils of dark magic. He was the most amazing man and I will never get over losing my dear friend. We name you an honorary member of Dumbledore's Army, because it takes a big heart to fight for what you believe in, but it takes an even larger amount of courage to bear with the loss of a child. We want you to know that we loved your son and that you are not the only ones who will be missing him." Luna was now bawling as hard as Mrs. Creevy. Luna Gave Mrs. Creevy a hug an the two women embraced for several wet minutes.

"Next, We would like to name Fred Weasley and honorary member of Dumbledore's Army." said Cho. Ginny began sobbing uncontrollably into Harry's shoulder. He tried to comfort her, but it was no good. She began to cry even harder when cho began to talk about Fred. At the Gryffindor House table, the entire Weasley clan had begun to cry.

"Fred was always there for us. He always knew how to make us laugh, and I know I will miss his smile. I just can't believe he's gone. We would like you all to know that Fred will not have died in vain if we cherish and keep his memory alive never forget his laugh, and keep this celebrated Hogwarts legend alive. Fred's positive attitude kept all of us alive this year and I know that most of us would have given up hope to a end to this war if he hadn't been there to wipe our tears. I'm just going to miss him…" The Weasley family, now, looked incomplete. It was heartbreaking to see George sitting there alone, his twin passed on. It was Ron's turn to pay his respects.

"I would like to name The Order of the Phoenix as our next honorary member of Dumbledore's Army." Ron stopped, drawing breath and observing the room of broken people. For a moment, Harry thought Ron would be unable to go on, but was mistaken. "Without the Order, Many of us would not be here today. Thank you. I just can't express my gratitude enough."

"We would be honored if the Staff of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry accepted our invitation to be an honorary member of Dumbledore's Army. You have been our teachers, confidents, inspirations, and muses for the entirety of our magical education. You have shown us strength and courage, and for that, we can never repay you. It was you who taught us how to fight, but ultimately, how to live." Hermione Granger said, suppressing tears. She hugged a teary eyed Professor McGonagall and shook hands with an absolutely drenched Rubeus Hagrid. Dean Thomas walked to the center of the staff table and proceeded with the naming.

"On behalf of Dumbledore's Army, I ask that the houselves of Hogwarts accept this honorary membership on behalf of Dobby. Dobby saved my life. I do not know if many are aware of this, but he saved all of our lives. Without him, we would still be in the middle of a war and more of us would not be here to witness tonight's events. Cheers, to Dobby, a free elf." Several Seconds passed before Harry realized it was his turn.

"To Teddy Lupin, my godson. Teddy is the son of Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks, who were killed in the Battle of Hogwarts. Teddy will never know his parents. We make him an honorary member to try to help him understand that his parents never wanted leave him. Remus and Tonks wanted to raise their son together, only in a less hatful world. They went to fight a war in order to raise their son a better world. It would have been a dishonor for them not to follow their hearts. He will always have us and he will always have me. I want him to grow up with the love of twelve parents, let alone one, and I know he will find that in all of us. I want him to grow up understanding that his parents loved him so much. It is people like Remus and Tonks that give every person the want to wake up in the morning. They gave us this opportunity and made the world a safer place for us to live in. To Teddy Lupin, give him the strength to understand…"

Harry had thought that it was over. He now stood facing Ginny, who, to his surprise, walked to the center of the stage.

"We would like to honor one more individual. Without him, the war would still be going on. It was his courage, love, perseverance, commitment, and belief that lead us to where we are now. He was in original leader of Dumbledore's Army. Not only did he teach us how to defend ourselves, but he taught us how live on after devastation. He has had such an influence on our lives that I do not believe any of us truly realize. There is nothing better to describe Harry Potter than an inspiration, and I know he may hate me for saying this, but a hero to be remember for years to come. Because of him, we can finally sleep at night. Harry Potter, will you be an honorary member of Dumbledore's Army?"

"Er, Yeah." he said, feeling very hot all of a sudden. Ginny began to clap. Soon, everyone in the room rose from their seats to mimic Ginny. _If only they knew what price I had to pay. She made it sound like I woke up and just decided to kill Voldemort one day. I don't deserve their gratitude._

It was midnight and Harry Potter was sitting in front of the large fireplace in the Gryffindor common room, a daily prophet on his lap. It had taken hours for the crowd in the great hall to thin out after Dumbledore's Army had finished their presentation. Everyone had wanted to shake hands with the famous Harry Potter, however, Harry Potter wanted nothing but to be alone. _Why hasn't Dumbledore just killed me as an infant rather than sending me to the Dursleys. That way, the horcrux inside me would be destroyed, and Dumbledore would be able to defeat Voldemort. The prophecy would have been discarded. _Harry could not help but think this, even know he know that wouldn't have been possible. He felt to worthless. Not only did he feel worthless, but he felt guilty. He had hurt Ginny, and he was still hurting her by being with her. He had worried sick for an entire school year; she didn't know if he was alive or not but she still kept him in her heart. Now, he was hurting her by letting her see him so depressed; it broke her heart to see him like this. Harry Potter couldn't win over the situation in any way he tried.

_Voldemort had just cast his spell. Simultaneously, Harry cast an expelliarmus. They met in the center. Then, the room became brilliantly orange. Next thing Harry knew, he was holding the elder wand and Voldemort has dead beneath him. It was then Harry realized something was wrong. It wasn't Voldemort dead beneath him, it was Ginny. _

Harry woke with a start. It had only been a dream. Ginny was alive and safe in her bed. Harry needed to walk. It was the only thing that would keep him awake, other than flying on his broom. No. He didn't have a broom. He had lost it along with Hedwig on the way to the home of Mr. and Mrs. Tonks. For now, a walk would have to suffice. Harry crept out of the portrait hole, disturbing a slumberous Fat Lady. He didn't care, though. He walked down the grand staircase to the first floor. The castle was silent. There were but a few somber ghosts floating about the grounds. Harry took a moment to observe his surroundings. Those who had been spending this last week at Hogwarts had certainly done an adamant job in repairing the historic building. The pillars were now standing again, structures that had been burnt now looked new, and the majestic House Hourglasses were repaired, though empty. Harry look upwards. The school had never seemed so big to him. Someone behind him coughed. Harry turned to see Professor McGonagall striding towards him.

"Potter, would it be possible for you to go back to Gryffindor Tower and get some sleep? I almost attacked you!" said an agitated Minerva McGonagall.

"Why would you attack me, Professor?"

"It's obvious, I would have thought. I'm patrolling the halls! Potter, we just had a _war! _I need to make sure the building is safe for those who have those not return to their homes already! Merlin only knows how many angry Death Eaters are waiting to get their hands on you!" she said in a huff.

"Oh. Um, I just can't wait for normality again." Harry said.

"I know, Potter, I know. I can't wait for it, either." Professor McGonagall said, sadness in her voice. "Now scat! Off to bed with you before I hex you on purpose!"

"Sure thing, Professor." he said. And with that, he returned to the Gryffindor Common Room. He picked up the _Daily Prophet _again, and began to read. Across the front page was a large picture of Dolores Umbridge, who was go to trial, for crimes against Muggle-Borns. Harry Scowled. He hated her. He wanted nothing more than to see her writhe in pain. Harry had performed the Cruciatus Curse before and had found it quite satisfactory. But, this, however, may be too tame for Dolores. Certainly something worse would be much satisfying…Harry hoped the worst for her.

Someone was shaking Harry. Harry swung at her attacker, his eyes still closed. When he finally opened his eyes to see a fiery red man inches above his own nose. Ginny. She budged him over from where he lay on the couch and pet her arms around him.

"Can I ask you something, Ginny?" Harry asked.

"Well, that's not a proper greeting! Sure Harry, ask away."

"Why can't you just get over me?" he asked, refusing to look in her eyes.

"What? I don't believe you!" she said, outraged. "How could you ever expect me to get over you? Why would you want me to move on?" Ginny feared the worst.

"Because." he began.

"Because _why?"_

"I've served my purpose." Harry said, embarrassed. Ginny's eyes softened. She knew he was feeling down.

"Harry, I love you. I know its probably too early in our relationship for me to be even thinking abut loving you, but I just do. You deserve a life, happiness. What would make you think otherwise?" Ginny said, looking him dead in the eye.

"Some people just aren't meant to live, Ginny, and I think I'm one of them." said Harry. It was true; he could hardly bear himself anymore. _Everything has been my fault. It has all been a result of my actions…_

"Look, Gin, I'm sorry. Can't we just start the day over? I didn't mean it." He lied.

"Sleep well, Love?" she asked, kissing his nose, several awkward moments later.

"I think so. Did you?" he asked, loving begin so near to her.

"My sleep was quite satisfactory. There was only one thing that could have improved it." Ginny said, loftily.

"And what would that be?" He asked, idly.

"Your presence." she replied casually. Harry's entire body went numb and he took her words as an open invitation to kiss her.

"Oi! Will you get off her!" Ron yelled, descending the stairs to the Boys' dormitory.

"Oh Ronald, must you always interrupt us?" Ginny said, annoyed.

_Well, _Harry thought_, this is almost normal! _

I know you're tired of hearing it, but I'll mention it again. All was _getting _well.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four. **

**To Hang a Hero**

Voldemort had been dead for one week. Harry had been staying at Hogwarts until he knew it would be safe from him, but mostly for Ginny, to return to the Burrow. Professor McGonagall had arranged for a portkey to transport Harry and the eight weasleys to the Burrow sometime that afternoon. Harry's mind was uneasy. _Snape deserves a headmaster's portrait, but how do I explain away his action without telling them what my plan had been with Dumbledore? How do I explain Snape knew Dumbledore would die without telling them about the resurrection stone or the horcruxes?_

Harry had been wondering the halls for what felt like days. He knew that today he would be leaving Hogwarts for the first time for such a long time. He didn't expect he'd be back here as a student again, even though he never completed his seven years of magical education. He sighed. These halls had been filled with so many memories. They had seen so many happy faces and had heard many whispers, many of which, in more recent years, were about Harry himself. He had never been just a typical Hogwarts student. Hogwarts had never seen a student with the responsibility of the fate of the entire wizarding world resting upon his shoulders before Harry Potter. No one besides Harry knew what such a responsibility felt like. Lately, Harry had been followed by whispers everywhere he went. Sometimes people would shout questions at him, but he was not listening. _How could anyone let me live with a piece of Voldemort inside me. I could have hurt everyone even more than I have…_

_Snape was the bravest man I ever knew and he was a Slytherin. I wish I hadn't spent so much time and energy hating Snape. He loved my mother. Before he died, he made me look into his eyes so he could die seeing my mother's eyes. No one here has had to look into the eyes of a dying man to fulfill his last living wish…_ Harry had been so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice Ginny had joined him in his walk. 

"A lot on the mind, Harry?" said Ginny. She was covered in mud and her long ponytail was dripping wet onto her shirt. 

"How long have you been walking with me?" he asked. 

"Only a minute or two. You were mumbling something about Snape under your breath. Would you like to talk about it?" she asked, ringing her wet hair. Droplets of water fell to the ground. 

"No. I'm fine. What happened to you? You look, no offense, like bloody hell." Harry said, looking her up from her feet, his eyes stopping at her wet t-shirt. Ginny couldn't help but smirk. She knew him so well…

"I encountered peeves. He dumped the contents of a portable swamp out on me from the stairwell above. I'd watch out for him if I were you." 

"Thanks. I'll watch out." Several minutes passed before either of them spoke again. They were now heading down to the Great Lake. 

"We're going home today. We're going home but not all of us will be there." Ginny said, her voice barely audible. She was referring to Fred. "Do you think George will want to sleep in there alone? I'll offer to switch rooms with him." she added, on the verge of tears. Harry reached for her muddy hand; it was all he could do for her. 

"I miss him too, Gin." Harry felt a pang of guilt. He had been feeling sorry for himself, disregarding Ginny. Ginny felt the same way. Still, she felt angry at Harry. He left her for a year, without a word as to where he was, while the death eaters and infiltrated ministry put a galleon reward on his capture. She was worried sick with grief. Still, she fought back with the DA. Ginny knew Harry was hiding something important from her, the horcruxes, to be exact, and she didn't know why. She tried to reason with herself. After everything Harry had been through, the past year to seven days ago, and he needed time to open up an talk. She would give him this time. After all, she loved him. It had broken her heart when, just tow days ago, he wanted her to forget about him because he had "served his purpose." His purpose was to be with her though, as her best friend, sidekick, partner in crime, love, and life-partner. 

"We're all falling apart, Harry. Ron is barely speaking to anyone who reminds him of Fred, Hermione is frantic about her parents, you're miserable, Mum an Dad are dealing with the loss of their baby, Harry_, their baby_, I'm trying to hardest to be strong but I just can't take this, and the others have shut themselves away! I just can't loose anyone anymore! My heart just can't handle it. What did they do to deserve this? Why are we so damned?" Ginny said, succumbing to tears, like she had done recently without much provoking, once more. She buried herself into Harry's chest and cried. 

"There are things I need you to know Ginny, and I'll tell you tin time." Harry said, stroking her head. It was a confession, coming from him. 

"I'm such a baby! What's wrong with me?" Ginny said, throwing her hands up in the air. Harry received a splash of mud on his shirt from Ginny's wet sleeve as she did this. 

"No, you're not a baby." he said. He wasn't too pleased about the state of his shirt. 

"Oh! I'm so sorry! Look at what I've done to you! I've made you look like you've run into Peeves and his swamp too!" Ginny blushed. 

"It's okay, don't worry about it." Harry said.

" I want to go clean up and finish some last minute packing before this afternoon." she said. 

"See you, then." Harry said. 

"Where are you going?" Ginny inquired .

"I need to talk to McGonagall." said Harry. He wanted to talk to her about Snape's portrait. 

"Want some company?" Ginny said, hopefully. Harry frowned.

"No thanks. I'll just see you later." he said. Ginny apologized for soiling Harry's clothes and headed for Gryffindor Tower. 

Harry had never liked Snape, personally, yet he respected and appreciated everything Snape had done and sacrificed to protect him. To Harry, Snape was a tragic hero, shunned in his last public action, yet so deserving of praise. _What should I say to McGonagall? How do I explain? _wondered Harry. He knew, that if he achieved, he would leave Hogwarts today doing one more good deed. Knowing this felt good. 

"Potter, what can I help you with?" said Professor McGonagall. After rehearsing several conversations with himself, Harry went to the Head's office. 

"Professor, I have something important to ask you, something I know you won't understand, but, Believe me, it's important."

"I'm listening, Potter." said McGonagall. wonder

"I'm going to get strait to the point. Professor Snape deserves a headmaster's portrait. He deserves it more than anyone." 

"Potter, are you feeling alright? Are you not talking about Severus Snape, the man who murdered Albus and was Voldemort's right hand?" 

"Snape was never Voldemort's. He changed sides the day Voldemort started hunting my mother. Dumbledore was already going to die and he asked Snape to kill him when the time was right. I can't tell you anymore than that, Professor, but you need to trust me." 

"I cannot believe that Snape was on our side! Its ridiculous! Are you sure you aren't mistaken, Potter?" said McGonagall. 

"Do you trust me, Professor?" said Harry.

"This isn't a matter of whether or not I trust you!"

"But do you trust me, Professor?" asked he. 

"Yes. I trust you, Potter." 

"Then can you fulfill my request Professor?" Harry knew he was asking a lot of her, but it needed to be done. 

"I can't make any promises, but I can look into it. I'll let you know as soon as I can with the definite. I still don

T understand where exactly you are coming from, but after what you've done for the wizarding world, I'll do my best." 

What felt like days later, Harry felt the portkey pull behind his navel, and within seconds, The Burrow's kitchen came into view. 


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: **Well, it's finally happened. Harry Potter is Wizard of the Month on ! If you've already seen it, then I trust that you know what happens to him at 17! Woot! Go Harry! This chapter is a spoiler for that, if you did not know, so best check that out first. What happens tin this chapter is a major influence from that. **

**disclaimer I do not own Harry Potter in any way, nor do I claim to. **

Chapter Five.

Weasley's Wizard Woes.

_What felt like days later, Harry felt the portkey pull behind his navel, and within seconds, the Burrow's kitchen came into view. _

An invisible weight seemed to have lifted off of Harry. The oxygen seemed to have filled his lungs once more. The little crowded room was so warm and familiar that he felt as if no harm cold come to him ever again. He stood solid on the spot where he has landed for several moments until he was nudged along by a Weasley, he could not tell which one, into the dining area.

"The luggage, I'm afraid, will not arrive until later tonight. Minerva said that after all the families were transported home, the luggage would be sent along." said Mrs. Weasley. She had worry lines upon her face and her expression was cold and distant. She has the look of a grieving mother, wishing her heart to live in happier times. Harry looked into her face, remembering that he bogart was her loved ones dead. Guilt conceived him.

"Why don't you four go and chat up in Ron's room. I'll call you down when dinner is ready." said she. The four, Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Hermione agreed and silently began up the staircase. Ron, in the lead, they proceeded to the first floor landing. When they reached the second floor hallway, Ron came to an abrupt halt, causing the three followers to stumble forward. Ron stood transfixed in the direction of the hallway which lead to Fred and George's old bedroom. Ginny spoke.

"Ron, I already offered to swap rooms with George while he stays with us. C'mon, let's just go up to your room." Ginny said. Harry looked at her, but she was determined not to look back. She had to remain strong and she had a tendency to break down in his presence. It couldn't happen again, as far as she was concerned.

Ron said nothing, and continued up the staircase.

"The ghoul's above. Mum says he's not doing well, though." said Ron.

"Has he actually caught spattergroit, then?" asked Hermione, attempting to lighten the mood. Ron ignored her and sunk to his bed. All the air had drained from the room. It was like they were four strangers inhabiting the same house. Harry felt something warm against his hand. Ginny small fingers were entwined with his. He held her hand and tried to put his many feeling into his squeeze. At the moment, she was the only one of the four whom he felt close to. She was the only one who made an effort to be close to him.

"Ron, my parents," began Hermione, before she has cut off by Ron.

"What about them?" said he, his voice muffled from his pillow.

"They can't stay in Australia forever, you know." Hermione said timidly. She missed her parents embrace terribly, especially given the current circumstances.

"I know, Hermione! You're _relentless, _aren't you!"

"Ron, I, what?" she said, hurt and surprised. Ron did not answer. He barely made any sense these days. Silent tears rolled down Hermione's face.

"Harry, why don't we go outside? Some fresh air, could do me some good." said Ginny. Harry nodded, and Ginny pulled him out from the room. When they arrived at the second floor hallway, Ginny released Harry's hand. She walked down the hall and into bedroom on the far left, Fred and George's old room.

Things were strewn about the room, and cardboard boxes lined the walls. Ginny walked over to a desk in a corner, and picked up the old punching telescope that Hermione had once been a victim to. She smiled sadly. She was going to miss Fred and his jokes, his laughter, his smile… Harry walked over to her, and put his hand upon her shoulder.

"I just hope George knows that I'm serious when I say I'll switch rooms with him. This has been the hardest on him than it has been on any of us. Fred was his twin, Harry…" she said, suppressing her tears. Harry had once thought Ginny to be rarely weepy, but that seemed like a lifetime ago.

"I'm sure he appreciates it very much, Gin" said Harry. He wished desperately for the means to comfort her.

"Let's go. I don't want to be in here anymore." she said. And they left the room empty and went outside to the small orchard where Harry once played two-a-side quidditch with Ron and Hermione.

The evening was still and silent. It was just about dusk. Ginny walked to the middle of the orchard and laid down, looking at the brilliant orange sky. She left Harry, standing, on the far side of the lawn, close to the garden of gnomes. He slowly walked over to her, unsure of what to do next. He laid down next to her. Slowly, Ginny moved closer to him, and rested her head on his shoulder. Being so near to him felt right. He just wanted to hold her in his arms and take all her pain away, and she wanted the same for him. They were good for each other.

Their moment of bliss was interrupted by the shouts of Mrs. Weasley, summoning them to dinner. Harry helped her up from the warm, hard earth, and together they went into the burrow.

Harry had never been to a more unbearable dinner, apart from his childhood dinners. No one spoke unless it was to ask a dish to be moved closer to them. For the first time in his life, Harry witnessed Ron reject food. Harry himself, however, was starving and accepted his food most willingly. Around ten minutes into the meal, the luggage arrived. Amongst the luggage was Ginny's school trunk, Harry's moleskin pouch, Ron's rucksack, and Hermione's small purse. The four were excused from the meal early, on account that they needed to unpack. Ginny stroked Harry's hair as she passed him before going into her bedroom. Ron was second to leave the table. He jaunted up two stairs at a time until he reached his attic bedroom. Harry was next to leave. As always, he was to share a bedroom with Ron.

When he reached the attic, he found Ron already settled into bed. Ron had no intention of showing recognition to Harry's presence, though. There was absolutely no need for Harry to unpack, as everything he needed in the world was in that small pouch. He decided to dress into pajamas, doubting that there was still more to do. He reached into his back pocket and found something long and thin. He hadn't the slightest idea to what it was. Perplexed, he pulled the offending object from his jeans pocket. With his heart beating at an unreal speed, he found the elder wand.

_How could I have been so stupid! How could I forget something so important! _Harry thought. He was livid with himself for forgetting to return the elder wand. In addition, he didn't have a clue as to when he'd get the opportunity to return the offending object.

"Ron, wake up." Harry half yelled.

"Wazzamatter, Harry?" asked Ron, hurriedly.

"The elder wand, that's what! I forgot to put it back into Dumbledore's grave!" Harry said.

"Oh, is that all?" said Ron, repositioning himself in his covers. Harry could not believe Ron. He snorted, and turned his back on his best mate. At least the wand was safe in his hands…

Still fully dressed, Harry placed the wand back into her jeans pocket. He would keep it on him at all times, until he had a change to return it to its proper resting place. There was a knock at the door.

"Harry, dear, there's someone here for you. I have him waiting in the living room." said Mrs. Weasley. Interested, he followed her down to the living room. There, Harry found Kingsley Shacklebolt, the newly appointed Minister of Magic and long-time Order member. Kingsley stood and extended his hand, which Harry shook.

"I'll just leave you two to talk." said Molly. She exited the room and went into the kitchen.

"How are you, Harry?" asked Kingsley.

" I'm doing okay. How about yourself?" Harry asked.

"Fine, thanks. Well, Harry, we can either make small talk for a half hour, or we can get strait to the point. Your choice, son."

"Either way, I guess." said Harry.

"Well, I must say it's getting late, so why don't we just get on with it, then?" he nodded encouraging. " Harry, as you know, I've been appointed as Minister of Magic. It is my wish, with the rest of the Order supporting me, that you join my new Auror department and help me work out all the kinks the program is facing currently. Together, I'm confident we can revolutionize the government and, for once, have society function properly."

"Kingsley, wow, I wasn't expecting that!"

"I know it's asking a lot of you and that this may be too much for you to handle right now, given the current circumstances, but whenever you're ready, I have a position waiting for you."

"But what about finishing my education? I don't have the requirements to become an Auror."

"You've proven yourself adamantly, I dare say! Harry, you're the reason the war is over! I'm positive you can handle this. There isn't a doubt in my mind that couldn't. There never has been. Will you at least consider it?" said Kingsley.

"There's no need to consider! I'm definitely in. I'm honored, sir!"

"Well, that's wonderful! I'll submit your paperwork tomorrow, then. Welcome to the Auror team, Harry." said Kingsley. Harry hadn't felt so happy in the last year. All was _getting_ well. After Kingsley left, Harry decided to get some much needed sleep. For the first time in weeks, he wasn't haunted with dreams of Voldemort, of Voldemort's death, or the deaths of anyone else. He had one peaceful night of sound blissful sleep.

In the morning, Harry went down to the kitchen for breakfast. He looked at the table, which was set for twelve, but there were only eleven ( Fleur included) people in the house. Mrs Weasley stopped and seemed to have notice this also. After counting the place setting, she removed one dish.

"Silly me! I must have set a place for Fred…" said she. "It's that clock that confuses me. Fred's hand has been on 'home' since his death." she admitted. Harry thought this was incredibly sad, thought it was nice to know Fred would be 'forever at home.' When everyone was seated, Harry decided to announce his big news.

"Kingsley asked me to join the Aurors and I accepted." he announced, unexpectedly. Almost everyone muttered a congratulation, Ginny was the exception.

"But that's so dangerous Harry." she said in a quiet tone.

"I'll be fine, Gin. Don't worry." he said. She smiled, although he smile wasn't genuine. She couldn't lose him. She loved Harry for his ambition and his bravery, she always had, but because of the war, his antics worried her. For the time, however, she'd drop the conversation.

Harry Potter sat amongst his loved ones and thought _All is getting well. _


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six. 

Crimes Against Muggle Borns

Harry Potter was snoring loudly, his face buried in his pillow. It was a wonder that he could still breathe. Pigwideon, the small owl Ron had gotten as a gift from Sirius, hooted angrily in the moonlight; he had not gone hunting in three days. 

"Alright, Pig. I'll let you out." whispered Ron, rising from the bed adjacent to Harry's. Ron tiptoed to Pig's cage, opened it, and led Pig, whom was now on his arm, to the open window. After the small owl had gone, he watched him fly away. He stood, transfixed, on the darkness outdoors. Guilt washed over him like a tidal wave. _Poor Hermione. _Ron thought. _I should talk to her…We should go and find her parents. It's been well over two weeks since the battle… _He looked to the many shining stars. The sky looked so peaceful. Ron closed his eyes and remembered back a few weeks; the sky had looked to troubled and disturbed. It was as if the sky had predicted the battle. It was as if there had been no sunlight the last year; there had been nothing but grey. Or so he remembered…

Again, he closed his eyes, knowing that things were going to be different. Slowly, he turned to look at the sleeping Harry with a horror struck expression. _My best mate __**died**__. I didn't see it, but Hagrid says he saw Harry __**die**__. Who else could have died? How much of this is my fault….If only I had never walked out of Hermione and Harry this year. _

He walked over to the armoire in the corner of the room. Hesitating, he dug into the middle drawer. His hand closed around something cold. "Dumbledore's Deluminator." He muttered. _He knew I would need more guidance than Harry and Hermione. He __**knew**__. _Wanting to be near Hermione, he left his bedroom….

At the end of the Narrow Hallway, Hermione was sleeping in Ginny's room. Ginny, however, had snuck down to the kitchen to find a bite to eat. She was just about to close the tin of cookies she had gotten into when something touched her shoulder. Startled, she quickly turned to find Ron. Enraged, she slapped him across the face with full force. 

"Ron, you absolute bastard! You scared the living daylights out of me!" she said hurriedly. 

"Ow! Wahwazthatfor!" He yelled. 

"The bloody war just ended! For all I knew, you were a rogue death eater. Its your own fault for sneaking up on me." Ginny said, lowering her voice. 

"So…my…um" He sputtered.

"What are you doing in here, anyways?"

"The same as you, probably." He said smugly, sounding alarmingly like Percy. Ginny smiled knowingly and left Ron to his thoughts. Ron frowned. She had taken the cookie tin with her. 

Ginny did not return to her room, however, but continued up the staircase to Ron's bedroom. 

"Hello, Harry!" Ginny yelled.

Harry Stopped snoring and lifted his head. 

"What are you doing here, Ginny?" He asked, searching for his glasses. 

"It's nice to see you sleeping. Well, I'm here because I had a feeling Ron needed a little 'one-on-one' with Hermione." She smiled before adding, "If you know what I mean." 

Harry made a face. The mental image of his two best friends snogging the face off each other wasn't exactly his idea of a settling thought. Ginny sat down on the edge of Harry's bed. For a while they didn't even speak, but merely watched each other closely. 

"Hermione, " Ron began. Hermione was sitting on the floor reading a book Ginny had lent her. She looked up at him. Everything had changed now. Everything, including the relationships between one another. She got up from the ground and placed her head upon his shoulder. He hugged her and smelt the sweet, flowery, scent of her hair, his amortentia. 

"Let's go." said Ron.

"Wh-where?" she said, tears sparking in the corners of her eyes. 

"Australia." 

"Now?" she said, backing up from him. 

"Yeah, whenever you want." he said. 

"It'd kill your mother if we left again." She said, sadly. It pained her with no end to have her parents so far away, unaware of her existence. 

"So? What about _you_?"

"Next week, Ron. We should go next week. Let's give sometime to have things settle down, here, first." She moved towards him. 

"Alright" he barely whispered. They were now nose to nose. As she had done to him, he kissed her with all his power. Something about his kiss made Hermione want to burst out laughing. When they broke apart, she couldn't contain herself. Obviously, Ron was horrified; Lavender had never laughed at his kissing techniques. Completely oblivious to Ron's terror, Hermione kissed him again. They soon fell asleep in each others arms. 

When Ginny finally spoke, Harry couldn't believe his ears. 

"But, Harry, you don't understand!" she protested.

"I don't understand? Me? Have you ever had someone tell you to defeat an evil wizard and that you are the only one who can? And no one really gives a damn about what happens to you as long as you save the wizarding word? And there isn't ten seconds that go by that you don't wonder if your making the right decisions. And it kills you inside because you know that even if you slip up a little, it's over and you and everyone you care about is dead. It physically makes you sick. Have you ever had someone constantly twist and prod at your mind? And you can't help but wonder if you're even better than he is? And even if you succeed, you'll be branded with the outcome for the rest of your life? No Ginny, you have **never**, nor will you **ever**, have that kind of responsibly forced onto you. You never been trapped like that! So, don't you ever try to tell me that I don't understand." he said. Ginny's eyes were wide and fearful. She didn't have anytime to say anything when the door flung open.

Mrs. Weasley looked absolutely livid to see them awake at such a late hour. 

"Bed, now!" She said to Ginny and ushered her out the door. 

They all were sitting around the kitchen table when George dropped a morning prophet in front of Ron. 

CRIMES AGAINST MUGGLE BORNS was written across the cover.

Harry picked it up and began to read it.

_Dolores Umbridge, Senior Undersecretary to the Minister, has been charged this morning with crimes against muggle borns and crimes against humanity. Ms. Umbridge pleads not guilty in her defense. A trial will take place sometime later this month. In the meantime, Umbridge has been sentenced to house arrest in her London address. Umbridge told reporters late Friday night "I stand my actions because they were what I had to do to survive. You try working when the minister of magic is under _

_You- Know-Who's control! I assure you will find that it is not possible." This seems to be a common response from most of the ministry workers who have, recently, been charged. Umbridge has worked as a professor at Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardly in the Defense Against the Dark Arts department and as the Hogwarts High Inquisitor. Umbridge has always stood by ministry decisions, according to her former Hogwarts colleagues. She is "Foul and cruel and deserves to rot in Azkaban" according to Cho Chang, one of Umbridge's former students…. _

Harry Stopped reading. She deserved a life sentence, he thought. But at least things were improving. Harry could hardly wait to hear from Kingsley and become and Auror. Ginny was still quite unsure about this latest decision of Harry's. But she would keep quite…for now. 

As the weather grew warmer and the sun became brighter, so did the wizarding world change. The state of the Ministry was improving like a rapid forest fire. On a sunny Tuesday, Harry received word from Kingsley. His paper work has been filed and there would be a place for him in the Auror department next Monday. Thrilled, Harry smiled to himself, knowing that _all was __**getting**__ well_. 


End file.
